i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize