we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
