think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
i think i have herpe
just one?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
