She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
