Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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