Screwed.edu
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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