Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
