uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
