I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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