"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
