your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I just want nice things and good sex
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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