Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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