Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
