If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Did we literally take a cab across the street
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
