I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
And then he peed in my hair
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