I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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