I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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