Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
