have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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