its not stalking. its research.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
