I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
