Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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