Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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