I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
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