She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
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If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
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siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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