I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
