no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
