After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
he shaved USA in his pubs
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
