i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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