I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
