so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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