If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
