Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
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Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
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Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?