it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I love having hate sex.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
