she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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