Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
