Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
