Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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