like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
