If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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