ugly people sure do ruin things
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
You need a sexual gate keeper
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
