Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize