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• (313): View more from Michigan

  It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight

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• (972): View more from Texas

  Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?

  (469): View more from Texas

  Ya, why?

  (972): View more from Texas

  We should try that some time.

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??

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  27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic

  (1-402): View more from Nebraska

  i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.

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• (585): View more from New York

  you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it

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• (914): View more from New York

  she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.

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  19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (251): View more from Alabama

  when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.

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• (276): View more from Virginia

  She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it

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• (512): View more from Texas

  I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.

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• (650): View more from California

  Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.

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