Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize
