i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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