Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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