dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
