I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize