dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
