I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize