She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
