dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
